New Satellite Can Track Pot Smokers From Space
Friday, April 24th, 2009 at 6:20 pm | By: Dudemaster
DATELINE:NEW_YORK — A new satellite went into orbit today in a new front on the War on Drugs. The satellite is called NARCO (Nick All Reefer COld) and it is expected to shock marijuana smokers out of the habit. NARCO can instantly detect any burning cannabis in the world. Police departments are preparing for mass arrests, once data begins coming in from the satellite.
NARCO was ordered built by a joint session of Congress in a rare all-night session. Red-eyed lawmakers approved funding for NARCO after smoking the peace-pipe and the satellite was born.
NARCO can see you rolling that joint!
NARCO can find pot smokers up to 10 miles underground. NARCO also has a built in GPS system to track any pot smokers that try to escape. Local police bureaus and the DEA are notified of the crime and an arrest warrant is immediately made. Thousands of arrests are anticipated by the end of today.
NASA is already busy working to upgrade NARCO. Laser beam guns will be installed on the satellite in May. The lasers will be used to vaporize any potsmoker and anyone around them.
Pot smokers reacted with shock and awe today, and wondered if it was simply paranoia. Many pot smokers heard an electronic voice in the distance when they looked at the sky.
“Pot smoker, this is NARCO. Do not resist. The police are coming to get you! DO NOT RESIST!”
Although a little late for April Fools day, this could be a reality if America doesn’t do something soon to stop the marijuana prohibition.
Source: http://www.thespoof.com/news/spoof.cfm?headline=s3i51844
And now for … the rest of the story.
Official, using the satellite to track smokers have decided that, due to the enormous number of pot smokers, to further conduct the “War on Drugs” would be a tremendous waste of taxpayer money and that legislators would immediately work toward legislation to legalize, regulate and tax marijuana.
I like the idea I’ll use the lazer beems to light my joints
….btw that joint thats about to get rolled that “NARCO” can see being rolled looks grrrreeeeeatttt
Oh, my goodness….I’m paranoid enough as it is about getting arrested/shot/all belongings stolen/pets murdered!!!! A scary thought. Time for more letters, calls, pamphlet distribution, etc…
oh shit russ u scared the shit out of me i literally just burned some bowls and then read this and was like NOOOOO!! lmao but then i saw laser beams and i was like hahaha..anyway im rambling on but ya man very much a real possibility if we dont stop this stupid war..peace